Are You A Dad or A Father?
By Jessica Rashiv on 11/29/2010 4:27 pm in Daddy
The question “Are you a dad or a father?” may seem silly at a first glance but there is a major difference between a dad and a father. Being a father is easy but being a dad is hard work as dad is always there for his children. He provides his children the financial security which includes a warm home, food, clothing and other essentials as well as providing a guidance and lots of love and support. So are you a dad or a father?
It is not easy to be a dad as it is very difficult to balance work and the role of a dad, especially if you are the only one who brings money into the house. Most fathers put their family first and will say that family is what matters the most but in reality, work often comes first even if they think that it does not. However, actions speak for themselves.
If you want to be a dad rather than a father, follow these few simple tips:
Call your kids. You can keep in touch with your kids even if you work the entire day. Tell them to call you when they come home from school for instance. Even if it is only a few minute call, it matters a lot to your kids because it tells them that you are thinking about them even if you are away.
Take time for your kids every day. If you want to build a relationship with your kids, you should turn off the computer and cell phone at least for a few minutes and dedicate yourself completely to your kids. Ask them how was their day, what they would like to do, etc. and listen what they have to say.
Plan family fun at least once a week. Make sure to find time to have fun with your kids at least once a week. Take them to the park or beach, play cards or whatever you and your kids have fun doing together. Be sure, however, to plan something different for each week to avoid family fun becoming a routine.
Teach your kids your values. Your kids look up to you and learn from you, however, do not assume that they will automatically pick your values too. Talk to them about different situations and tell them what you would do and why.
Do not be too harsh on your kids. The days when it was normal for the kids to be afraid of their fathers are long gone. It is crucial to set clear rules and boundaries, however, do not punish your kids for disobeying the first thing when you come home. Instead, ask them how are they and how was in school before you focus on disciplining.
Nurture your marriage/relationship. Your kids learn a lot from your relationship with your wife/partner. If the two of you have a loving relationship marked with lots of understanding and respect, your kids are more likely to have the same kind of relationship with their partners when adult. Show them how love should supposed to look like and nurture your marriage/relationship.
In the end, learn to accept that it is normal to make mistakes and that there is no such thing as perfect parent. The fact that you are interested in how to become a better parent alone reveals a lot about you as a parent. You most certainly do not need to worry about the question “Are you a dad or a father?”
Award-winning researcher/author with superb skills; editor of books and articles. Former in-house Assistant Editor and Proofreader of a peer-reviewed family linguistic journal. I have also edited or ghostwritten books and chapters published nationwide. Skilled in research, editing and writing baby and family subject materials and literature. Ph.D. with sixteen years of university teaching experience. Check me out at Google
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